your crazy ex-girlfriend

2010-01-20T13:25:00.001+08:00

2010-01-08T02:26:00.002+08:00

I need to do well this year, in my business, school and relationships. I want to make every experience worthwhile, and that my choices will be lifelong ones. I ought to be more driven, be the initiator and get things moving!

We can do it!

2010-01-07T01:47:00.004+08:00

Hello Two Oh Oh Nine.

Hello to more love and less hatred, I think I have successfully fulfilled my 2008 resolution. To aid me in my ongoing dedication to spread the love, you can give me free hugs when you see me! I wish I saw the world in a better light, just like how colormekatie can..

Well, as always, a list of resolutions (i'm not too late i hope, still within a week and i've been keepin up!) i would try to keep to for the new year.

- Be punctual! Stop thinking everyone else will be late because I always end up being one of the latest.

- Start saving for the future! Have a detailed expense plan!

- Scale greater heights! Build allthingslovely's brand and persevere!

- Be a better designer! Stop doing last minute design work and passing it off as though I've put in effort.

- Start sleeping earthly hours. Retune my body clock for a better complexion!

- Lose the flab. 'Nuff said.

Honestly, 2009 was a great year for me. Great friends, amazing boyfriend, supportive family and a wonderful trip to remember! 2010 is raring to begin! <3

2009-12-17T02:18:00.005+08:00

And there we go, just a couple more days and it'll be 2 years. Feels like a lifetime especially with the saga smacked right in the middle of the relationship which just lengthens everything. And the travels too! I remember him telling me how boring a person he is, right at the beginning of the relationship and right now it just seems like bullshit 'cos I've never had anyone else entertain me just as he does :)

So the boyfriend took me out for a quiet dinner @ White Rabbit after my horrendous night of slogging for the Viscom show. I loved the ambience and the little surprises they had for me! Defini

tely a night to remember.

And the following activity is of course compulsory for the birthday girl.. involving tiles and chips. Haha. Thanks to Ting and CW for the cake, <3>

Looking forward to Christmas and 2010.. (too many feasts and too little time to diet!)

2009-12-16T14:47:00.003+08:00

Been busy with ATL now that both Ting and Carmen are away in Goldcoast! My daily activities include sleeping till midday, replying emails and sending parcels! Not to mention the much despised trips to Paya Lebar & Sengkang. God I need a carrrrr.

I have three air tickets booked for next year, to Thailandddd. 2 to BKK and 1 to Phuket! Phuket was a steal at 70bucks!! :) Am very pleased with self! *cartwheeeels*

Post Office time.

2009-11-17T05:49:00.002+08:00

6am and I'm furiously hitting the Cmd+S buttons on my MBP, stuffing myself silly with weird tasting tomato flavoured chips and wishing I had more time on my hands. Seriously I'm a bummer and it doesn't help that all deadlines are crammed in one week's time. Not to mention exams. And I'm turning a year older too.

Weekends are so different now, no more waiting spells endless late night mahjongs. Speaking of which, I've been denied of mahjong the past weekend and I'm so looking forward to the coming month of well-deserved holidays. I haven't been watching my weight much and December shall be my test of endurance.

Watch this space!

2009-11-11T01:20:00.004+08:00

Makes me go all light headed!

2009-11-06T00:38:00.003+08:00

Always the being eager beaver at the start of things, I just hope the enthusiasm never fades! Looking forward to a whole new dimension.. in many aspects! :) Load of projects to clear.. readings to do.. and getting sick of this paperchase. 1.5 more years to go!

2009-11-05T01:51:00.001+08:00

My BF is one mad shitz.

2009-11-04T01:39:00.003+08:00

Hmmm.. Marlboro X Campbell Soup...

I'm an avid tissue fan. I will love these on my desktop! :D

Strawberry choc bites! Delectable!

Student project. Ice cream tubs! Lovely!

DemocraTEA

Going crazy over packaging design! I LOVE IT!

2009-11-03T03:11:00.002+08:00

Missing my little ones.. as always!

Missing our Eurotours.. :(

Missing you on a Monday night!

2009-11-02T21:36:00.005+08:00

So Halloween came and went. I was on the tour bus with the girls: Wanting, Carmen, Emileen, Kat and Maggie and it was truly a blast! Free flow of Belvedere on the buses and one drink at each club..all for 40bucks! It was money well spent considering the laughter we had..

I have so much work to do and its driving me nuts cos I havent exactly been starting on it! Thank God for the S/U option I have officially one exam to study for. :) Haven't thought of what to do for my 22nd this month end! Choosing from an iphone and a getaway is easy peasy, I'd choose the latter for sure!

Back to my WATER project :(

2009-10-19T02:23:00.003+08:00

It's impossible to live a life without regrets and I could only wish for one that's close to having none. I guess sticking with our original plan of making this work is still holding fast...there's so much more to this than what we see! I love allthingslovely and things are going to take off for sure! Don't be disheartened because we're definitely better than that! :)

School is coming to an end and I can proudly proclaim that I've been lazing my balls off the entire semester. Whatever happened to "I can work harder this sem now that ZX is not around school! I can run 3 times a week! I can concentrate on allthingslovely cos there's no more JCRC!" Load of bullshit. I'm still the usual procrastinator and more of an excuse-maker. Everything related to school take a backseat and that is bad. I need my awakening. Real fucking soon.

Been having the best weekends! Back from BKK with Ting and then 2 BBQs in a row. Wish drinking Yakult could help dissolve my fats but apparently it doesn't happen that way. Time to sleep my sorrows away.

Goodnight, world.

2009-10-05T03:41:00.002+08:00

I just received a surprise postcard from Yongyi and I'm all smiles! Maybe its the surprise factor but what's really super duper heartwarming is the fact that I have such wonderful friends who are always around, regardless of how far away they are. Another one is Miss Loh who is omnipresent. She is fantastic, and so is her boyfriend. Xinwei.Yekai's new phrase is "Thanks ah...eh..thanks ah..thanks leh Hanni...thanks ah.." X 123045645y76453. What's the crack! Haha. Stupid irish champion. I miss you bitch.

I ain't doing jackshit at school recently. It's worrying but enjoyable. I have quizzes and assignments due the next week but I've been moping my recess week away. Now that it has come to an end I still feel happy gorging my face with mooncakes, hoping that getting fat will stop me from worrying about school. Talking about fat, I've been gaining a tremendous amount of weight I'm starting to look uncannily like a mother whale. My thighs are expanding and they're almost the size of my boyfriend's humongous thighs. Fuck.

Fuck. My usage of profanities have been seriously decreasing. I'm going to BKK again next week and it just reflects how much I don't really give another flying fuck about my third year. I need a little therapy and its a joy to while my time away at massages and Platinum. Great stuff.

I love mahjong. I love my baby nieces.

2009-09-29T02:52:00.002+08:00

Shit like this tickles me at 3am in the morning when the BF is fast asleep in my bed and I'm bored to bits because I slept till 1pm today. Damn.

2009-09-22T03:10:00.005+08:00

I should start appreciating the kind of love and sacrifice he has for me, there are moments when I've let myself down for being the usual bratty, stubborn slut who can't get over her own ego.

Meantime, here are the few crazy/beautiful people present in my life.

Mr Big! At our cycling expedition.

The lovely Irish shampoo and her slitty-eyed man. Victor's Kitchen!

Mad couple, Wanting and Chyewei. Mahjong partners-in-crime.

Jerry and Carmen! Wedding shots hahaha..

Huifen, Hoho, Kat and Miens. At Tapas O! Missing you Jenni and Lynette.

Special one for the birthday girl.

My little lovely baby Sheylene!

And the not-so-little Sheyenne dear!

I wish every weekend was this long.. Back to school blues, yet again.

2009-09-14T04:33:00.001+08:00

Is it evil to wish for someone to die? Rather random but I have this sudden surge of disgust for you.

2009-09-14T04:03:00.002+08:00

4am and I can hear my dad's snores through his closed bedroom door. Always amazed at how my mum tolerates the grunting at unacceptable decibels.. When ZX snores it's almost like an auto alarm clock for me - I'll wake up just to give him one hard shove and there he goes, all quiet again.

Semester's midway and it's been great so far. Sometimes the loneliness kicks in on nights when he's back home but schoolwork, allthingslovely and facebook keeps me drained enough to fall asleep quickly and unafraid things that go bump at night. But I still do the whole no-drinking-water-after-12am routine, for fear that I'll have to wake up to pee in the middle of the night. Loser.

Am thinking of taking a sabbatical next semester since I've cleared most of my modules. I should start getting a neat internship and get inspired for my FYP. Seriously worries me when I think about post-graduation days. The only time I get excited is when I know for sure allthingslovely is taking a new direction and moving to a new level. Hopefully then I will be a Creative Director! Hahahaa... for my own business. I will be a happy woman.

Tired, adios.

2009-08-28T09:11:00.003+08:00

I miss Europe. Better start saving for MY grad trip!

2009-08-07T04:20:00.002+08:00

Not your average girl.

2009-08-03T02:31:00.003+08:00

Love of mine some day you will die
But I'll be close behind
I'll follow you into the dark

No blinding light or tunnels to gates of white
Just our hands clasped so tight
Waiting for the hint of a spark
If Heaven and Hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the NOs on their vacancy signs

If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark

In Catholic school as vicious as Roman rule
I got my knuckles bruised by a lady in black
And I held my tongue as she told me
"Son fear is the heart of love"
So I never went back

If Heaven and Hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the NOs on their vacancy signs

If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark

You and me have seen everything to see
From Bangkok to Calgary
And the soles of your shoes are all worn down
The time for sleep is now
It's nothing to cry about
'cause we'll hold each other soon
In the blackest of rooms

If Heaven and Hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the No's on their vacancy signs

If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark
Then I'll follow you into the dark

Love my merbeebee..

2009-07-23T04:18:00.002+08:00

I'd love to tell you a million times more how much you mean to me!

2009-07-21T04:27:00.000+08:00

I love you baby... through and through..

2009-07-20T01:44:00.002+08:00

Finally back here in truly sunny Singapore, where heat and humidity never fails to piss one off. My honeymoon went well as intended, of course, with our rigorous planning across oceans. And well as you might already know it was, too, peppered with a couple of usual squabbles and bitchfits.. but hey, all's good now.

So we went to a total of six countries together, covering 9 cities namely
Germany - Munich (!), Berlin
Holland - Amsterdam (!)
France - Paris
Spain - Barcelona (!)
Italy - Rome, Florence, Venice (!), Milan

and it was exhausting but definitely worthwhile..so much for his gradtrip and my sneaky holiday.

It's over and a new chapter begins for my love come Monday, hope we'll be able to cope and meanwhile I need to earn some cash for the next holiday! (and pay my dad, too)

2009-06-28T02:04:00.003+08:00

Alone for the first night in Vienna.

Vienna is beautiful, apart from the numerous tourist traps just like in any other city. I'm staying in a nice hostel with 7 other girls in the room. I certainly do hope that me coming from a H1N1 stricken city will not deter me from making new friends.. haha.

Skyping with Sinwee and Yao was good fun. I love this blend of friendship. It's 3 of us from 3 different parts of the world reuniting on Skype. Feels like we're talking over a nice warm cup of Teh Cino at Al Ameen on a normal Saturday night.

My hives has been recurring. It's bearable but annoying..I am starting to wonder if it's the beer that gives me such side effects. My anti-histamines are running out and I'm just 58 hours away from seeing my boyfriend. Counting down never felt worse.

So tomorrow I'll be back in Munich. Somehow it feels like home, and seriously if I ever have to relocate, Munich will be a great place to live in. Kinda like the feeling of being alone here..but the city has alot of Turkish people and they always seem to look dangerous. :( Dreading the train ride back as well.

I miss the two little ones :(

2009-06-14T00:50:00.003+08:00

It's one of those serendipitous moments that leaves me in awe, having the world passing me by, embraced by a love from miles away yet feeling warm and fuzzy at heart.

Eleven days in Munich and I'm totally following a strict regime of sleeping before midnight and waking up at 7. It feels amazing to gorge myself with vegetables and start feeling healthy. The weather is so fantastic it keep me awake and fresh for long, even the bounce in my step seems amplified.

I love it here, apart from the times when I'm pining for my loved ones. Sausages are good but the pork sucks. Bier ist gut! (Ok that was an understatement). Now I can't wait for the rest of Eurotrip 2009 with the love of my life! Eurotrip 2009 spells Amsterdam, Belgium, Paris, Spain, Italy and Berlin!

That's what keeps me going..

2009-06-02T05:03:00.002+08:00

Like the pimple on my back, you're annoying, painful yet always around. :D

2009-05-31T02:50:00.002+08:00

2 more days and I'm off to Deutscheland and I'm immensely thrilled! Trip of a lifetime.. with new friends and my fantastic significant other, I cannot ask for anything more. Packing will hopefully be a breeze tonorrow I hope. I'm off to dream about piazzas and basilicas.

Love.

2009-05-20T12:17:00.002+08:00

I'm been busy despite the numerous slacking days that I've allocated over the holidays. I miss my friends who are happily holidaying. Thank God Wanting's back just yesterday.

It's been a year since it cut so deep. I hope I'm over it and I guess I should be happy the way things are now. Oh well.

2009-05-06T03:29:00.003+08:00

Xinwei says I'm going to go through what she's feeling when I jet off to Germany. Seriously what will those 26 days without you bring? I will party like there's no tomorrow okay. My boyfriend doesn't read my blog/facebook so it's actually okay to bitch about him. God knows who reads this but hell there are quite some people lurking around the blogosphere.

I don't know if it's just me but I seem be easily annoyed nowadays. Not just quick to anger, but also quick to express my displeasure, be it through speech or action. Enough is enough, we are all old enough to speak up for oneself and speak your mind like you never have. Two cents or not it's just what makes you feel justified.

I'm going back to BP for a couple of days to invigilate and it just gets me all excited! I haven't been to the new premises yet and I just hope that it'll all be familiar once I step in. Next week I'm doing the Imperial Tobacco thingy with Huihua. Seriously need to tune my body clock all over again. It's crazy to sleep at 5 and wake up at 2 daily. My failed weight loss plan is just another nagging reminder to have a better lifestyle.

ZX and I went for a swim today and it was bliss all over again. Despite being the most vulgar person on this face of earth, he is undeniable the sweetest and most accommodating bugger. I always win anyways. Went to my sister's place to our steak dinner and my nieces were super uber cute as always. Yenne is no longer the cranky lil bitch, but a transformed prancing little princess with a supremely high rate of words per minute. She's barely 3 and she spouts an amazing amount of kid gibberish hat can amuse us to no end. The tiny one Sheylene is a darling it makes me want to make Rabbit Babies.

.......

Blessie passed away today. It was so coincidental, considering that ZX and I just finished watching Marley and Me this afternoon which ended up with me sobbing like a sputtering idiot. Blessie was the dog whom Summer gave birth to four years ago, the 3rd of the lot. She was born with her cranium deformed - part of her brain wasn't covered by her skull which resulted in some handicaps. She was a fighter. When Summer was still nursing, the other three would bully Blessie and there was always the massive scrambling for teats. Summer would brush off the trio, Vodka, Princess and Diffy just to feed Blessie..

I remember the day we took her to the vet and she told us Blessie wouldn't last for long. But she did. And she went to a really good family who loved her with all their heart despite her handicaps. Blessie had coordination problems, both in walking and sight due to her birth defects. But she never gave up and she always continued to bring joy to her family.

You'll be remembered dear Blessie, today, tomorrow and always.

2009-04-29T02:44:00.006+08:00

Our recent days together has really gotten me super excited about the megatrip. We haven't gone down to ironing out the kinks, but we've been having a fantastic time lounging, moping and slacking of late. It's been almost a year since I've been a manic-depressive bitch and I'm proud that I finally took the courage to take the step to be truly happy.

Yesterday we were taking stocks with Carmen and Jerry. The girls got down to business while the guys hung out. Glad they got along just fine. Baby and I decided to buy lottery for the kicks of it and we ended up betting on soccer too!

We did a shoot at Supperclub today! Finallllly, he's seen how professional shoots are like, guess it's kinda like an eyeopener, PLUS we get a hundred bucks for 4 hours of well-spent boredom being extras. :)

Wanted to head to Hanabi for the buffet dinner but he's got weird stomach upset symptoms for the past few days so we decided to skip the raw fish and went to Aston's instead! So much hype around it yet we haven't had a taste of it 'cos of the snaking queues everytime we're there.. Today we had dinner at like 6 and it was almost full already. Yao talks about Aston's as though it was legendary - truth be told, it was worthwhile for 2 thick, juicy chunks of steaks, sides, starters and drinks included, to cost below 40 bucks. :) We were happy people.

Baby came over to my place after that.. we were going to Taka for some serious shopping but we gave up ad continued the bus ride home. We watched The Prestige, both of us for the 2nd time, and it was really and incredibly wonderful show. Two days ago we watched Marley and Me till the LAST 15 minutes and we had to get outta the house. I already know Marley died and it's going to get all emo and sad. Zzz. Wonder how I'll cope when my sister's six dogs start expiring...

I've officially moved out of hall. Not that my room has always been occupied, but I really did have a helluva stuff to move out! Reminds me of the time when I moved out of my previous room with a truckload of stuff. Like seriously, I am a junk collector like my mum is. She has a whole room of stuff, not to mention her already full storeroom. It's horrible cos she keeps irrelevant, useless shit that she cannot bear to throw away. So right now I have all the stuff that I've moved home lying in my living room and I'm drowning in all that clutter.

Allthingslovely has been stagnant but I'm so uber excited for the slew of updates that will fill the space! Gosh it's been just three months and it feels like a long time. Thanks to my lovely girls - Wanting, Carmen and Jayne!

And here's something random, a conversation I had with my sis just minutes ago at 4+ am..

2009-04-23T03:44:00.000+08:00

There are moments when I feel like melting away.
This is one.

2009-04-18T00:39:00.000+08:00

I never knew the Mid Autumn Festival could drive me so crazy until Typo came along.

2009-04-17T03:27:00.002+08:00

Exams officially ended, time to work on Typography and Graphic Design, and then I will ascend to Visual Communication Heaven..

2009-04-12T02:03:00.002+08:00

There's just an incredibly special way you deal with me that is so endearing it melts away my fears, anger and sadness in a split second. And there's the smile that never fades; everything's for you now, my dearest happy pill.

2009-04-12T01:58:00.000+08:00

Overwhelmed by the stress of exams, I need a real, proper breather, hope it happens soon.

2009-04-07T04:15:00.002+08:00

First night in ADM after a long while. Kinda brings back the feel of last semester when Yy, Von, Ning, Kwok and I were rushing work during unearthly hours. Feels superb, despite the immense heat and stuffiness the lab was radiating. A short conversation struck me with fearsome thoughts again - it kills me to even think of the possibilities that might occur, like last year. I hate being stuck in 2008; I swear I need to stop lurking in those less-than-happy times and start believing.

One more week and it'll be over.

2009-03-31T02:28:00.005+08:00

Thanks for adding a new gold medal to my collection. According to statistics, clearly you only win gold medals when you are attached to me. Just like how Chelsea wins/draws matches only in my presence, preferably at Hall 13's TV room. I am not just your personal lucky charm, I am yours to keep!

Exams are almost here and I can't get started with studying. As usual, due to the crazy books and all that are due. I am officially screwed. So to alleviate the pain, we took to drinking at NTU's Mayflower Staff Club on a Monday night. I like.

Other de-stressing activities we engage in include... Drawing.

I can't ask for anything more!

2009-03-29T04:11:00.002+08:00

Sharing a bed for the past three semesters has been a feat. You are huge and I'm expanding too. Suffered countless neckaches and backpains from those days yet we always concur that it's all worthwhile. Now the semester is drawing to an end and you're all ready for the dirty ol' corporate world, everything's gonna take a bit of getting used to all over again and I cannot deny that it is going to scare me all over again. I'm a wuss when it comes to changes and this is truly a great challenge. The next one will come when I begin work but hey we'll take small steps if not baby ones to conquer this one.

2009-03-27T20:02:00.002+08:00

It does take a great deal for a copious amount of dislike to form within me. I know for sure that in this case, jealousy isn't involved but it kicks up a storm in me, that horrible, twisting feeling when it all hits me. I don't know if you'll ever feel that my friendship with you was truly genuine, those nights we've had, 9 years of friendship might not be a big deal to you but it is to me. I find it hard to even vocalize how betrayed I feel, how you chose him over me and how I lost you. Not just as a confidante, but a true, close sister that I know I did hold dearly. Today I wish I took my words back. I wish I never had a friend like you, I wish you sat on the fence and not take a side. For I didn't when it came to you, that was the least I could do. It's disheartening to give so much but never receive, seeing you was worse than a mere stab in the back.

2009-03-22T04:17:00.002+08:00

Out of Lydiabong's photoshoot on Friday. Looks a little FHM hahahahaha but the sex factor doesn't ooze of course. I am officially excited about my holidays. I speak too soon la, my exams aren't even over and here I am trying to plan for everything else. Totally dread moving out of hall come 30th April. ALL OVER AGAIN.

2009-03-22T02:50:00.002+08:00

I hate work-filled weekends, they're just depressing.

SJ and I had quite a happy, lengthy chat. It's been awhile. Hamsters to men to everything else, it all began when I thought about how we outgrew the "Fuck man, it's Friday why am I staying at home? I feel like a loser." That was 4 years ago.

Now? Not even close to going out lor.

2009-03-18T20:28:00.002+08:00

I have a serious problem with working and doing stuff at the eleventh hour, usually a make or break massive heart attack inducing project which i would have left rotting at the depths of my (shared) desk and/or desktop.

I miss last semester when we would all meet at the ADM cafe during unearthly hours to work on the crrrraaaazzzzzyyyyy assignments, forever a mad rush. Run back to hall at 830, take a quick, refreshing shower and run back to school at 9am only to find the whole world late. Those were the days man. And then came graphic design's final project, like a 6 week thingamajig which I had the idea nestled somewhere in my cranium and never got about doing it, panicked, waited for the day before the exhibition and managed to produce a whole pasar malam's worth of stuff. That almost left me with an incredible heart seizure and a very happy A-. I got lucky.

This semester was the bilingual cultural magazine, which I escaped from during Week 6, and during the night before the critique on Week 10, I rushed out 9 pages of layouts and I kinda loved myself for it. And then the recent Dada essay which was due at 4pm and I ended up writing it 2am, the night before. I should stop this shit right now.

Today mid-week 12 , I am doing something which I should have touched since week 3. Bless my poor soul.

2009-03-17T04:08:00.002+08:00

I'm sorry but I haven't been mincing my words of late. I'm such a prick sometimes, I think the bitch of karma might just get me soon.

The doors of the dreaded study rooms are now open. One month to exams. End semester, Germany and Eurotrip awaits me! Then Year 3, when Zx begins work and I'll be bored to death in hall cos the whole world graduates and I suppose I might need a roommate to aid me in suppressing my boredom.

Okay, back to the Dada essay.

2009-03-15T14:20:00.002+08:00

This insane craving for Indomie is driving me nuts - My appetite has been increasing of late, so much that I'm beginning to worry about ballooning all over again. Now now, can't wait for the smoked chicken we're bringing back to Hall later on.. :)

My academic pile-up is probably the cause of all madness. I have like 7 books to make from scratch, an essay to write and other random nitty gritty stuff that I've left lying around for the longest time.

I need to clear my mind (and my wardrobe), get started with work and stop sleeping in this dreary, wet weather.

Jeslin's in town. I can't wait to meet her yet I hate to be busy when she's around.

2009-03-10T15:34:00.001+08:00

Allthingslovely is into our 7th collection! :) Damn glad.

2009-03-08T04:03:00.003+08:00

The past relationships I've been in has really opened up my eyes to be a better partner. Sometimes I can feel my anger and pissyness surging, but it gets a little easier to contain, apologise, and smile all over again. I need to stop brooding over stupid things, and I need to learn to be less reliant. This always happens. After one year, I feel that crazy inseparable feeling and it kills me. Sometimes, I have the tendency to spout amazingly rude and inconsiderate words without censoring all displeasure. Bad. We have to learn to be a little tactful, in other words, fake, when it comes to conversations. This, I must really learn.

My boyfriend has always struck me as quite a hot-tempered person. After much training (muahahahaha) , I can sense his improvements - with occasional slip-ups, of course - but in general, I salute his doings for I am pretty sure I'll be less tolerant if it was myself I'm dealing with. Nowadays our arguments are solved with his trademark Tzong Tzuan smile, or with me throwing my various lotions + books at him. I aim quite well. If not it ends with multiple attacks on his chest, thighs and hard knocks on the head. Since you so fit, HIT YOU LOR!

We are true, living examples of the Dating Violence campaign that NTU has been trying to emphasize. but we do it in good fun...though I'm always the 玩不起. But you're always the LOSER BADOOZER.

2009-03-08T03:48:00.002+08:00

I get a little emotional and defensive when it comes to my friends, and even more so when i feel betrayed and unappreciated and all. I don't doubt that I have a tendency to be a tad too clingy with my partner, but that's just me. I make a conscious effort to meet up with people that I truly bother about, but it is, definitely, saddening when you know that the other party does not give more than a damn about you. Just a random thought about the ones who have knowingly drifted away and yet finding it hard to make that simple call just to say that you do bother. We all get caught up in the rat race, get cycloned into a whirlpool and never come out again. Sometimes I hate proximity friends but that's really how we get by. Like if you stay at Changi I won't give a flying fuck to meet you.

It's sad but fucking true.

2009-03-08T02:53:00.002+08:00

Tzong Tzuan, my favouriterestest test test person in the universe and beyond.

2009-03-04T16:55:00.003+08:00

It's remarkably tough to deal with death and it scares me just to think.

This photo, machiam wedding. Just in case I can't make it for mine.

I miss you sayang.

2009-03-02T03:20:00.003+08:00

yet another passing; our words on the plane so real

rest in peace.

2009-02-24T14:46:00.002+08:00

Not the best codfish laksa around. So disappointing. :(

2009-02-22T05:33:00.002+08:00

This is a week late but who cares. We decided to forgo the typical commericalised celebration for V'day so we cooped at home, had our usual, very domestic weekend, and whipped up a storm.

My boyfriend loves my cooking so much it's not funny. We had a spread for Valentine's Day and an extremely crazy time (me in the kitchen busy as a bee) and him cleaning up as usual.... (slavery is the way to go). Here goes!

Our tried and tested mango salmon salad!

Our amazingly done Black Pepper Steak, done to perfection.

Roasted po-tat-toes with sour cream and bacon bits as sides!

And the dessert I'm super proud of.. Mango Pomelo Strawberry Sago.

Disclaimer: No stomachaches or deaths were incurred during the production, consumption and digestion of the aforementioned dishes.

2009-02-22T05:00:00.001+08:00

What are your priorities?

2009-02-22T04:43:00.004+08:00

At my happiest, I always fall the hardest.

I remember the first medal you gave me, after MR500.

you said it was the first proper gold medal you won while rowing

and you wanted me to have it so much because

you wanted me to be part of something that you love.

the second medal\\

your first PM cup win

i had it slipped into my bag a day after the race

where i could feel your ecstasy, yet i was so shaken

because i didnt know if you still loved me

because we were in the limbo of lost dreams

2009-02-22T04:33:00.004+08:00

I don't know if this has always been a problem but I'm starting to trust people less. It's not that I'm always in doubt but everyone seems questionable at some point in time. On hindsight I suppose I've always been this way. Random thought.

Sheylene is a such a darling. She makes me want to have babies soon. :)

2009-02-20T12:41:00.002+08:00

Half of the semester has flown by and I still end up feeling a little clueless here and there. Not a very good sign. Thank god for the recess week and my little impromptu getaway to BKK this week with Wangwang! Still feeling a little disheartened with the school's red tape. I guess that's part of being in a new school where people are afraid to change rules, or make new ones when the need arises. On the brighter side, June seems like a good time to go, when it's not too cold and I can enjoy the company of my loooove and Eurotrip is definitely the way to go! No more dilemmaaa.... finally.

2009-02-19T01:43:00.002+08:00

This is growing out of proportions - 6 months might be too long indeed but is my reliance and dependence answering for me? It's a tough choice to make - staying in Stuttgart might cost me another year of study in ADM, it's impossible for me to ever do so. Is Munich the next best choice? :(

2009-02-16T19:08:00.002+08:00

I recently declared Hanniwong's state of emergency due to the loss of my extremely important pendant presented to me on the night of my 21st birthday. Been flustered for days and racking my brains and scouring through pictures, searching in the most impossible crevices, trying to recall where the fuck it was lying at.

Alas, my very bright beloved has unwittingly vacuumed my precious necklace into Sam's vacuum cleaner on an eventful night. In my distress, some sudden enlightenment struck him and he opened the little dust bag.

And there it was, sitting amidst the tangled mess of hair and dust, my little ten cent coin.

2009-02-16T17:54:00.002+08:00

My rose-tinted glasses are finally off.

I am feeling slightly disenchanted after an academic consultation which was severely discouraging, and very, very disappointing. ADM's flexibility cannot be exercised - so much for being an art school and thinking out of the box. To top that all up I have yet another bout of urticaria, caused by god-knows-what, a pile of assignments, and my time of the month to boot.

That said, I had a great Saint Valentine's Day! Again, immeasurable and immense happiness. :D

2009-02-15T01:13:00.002+08:00

To be able to have butterflies in my stomach consecutively for the past year is a feat.

I love you bee bee.

2009-02-11T16:58:00.002+08:00

So here comes a chance that I've let slip three years ago when I could've gone to New Zealand - this time to somewhere even more challenging with the existing language barrier - I'm going to Stuttgart, Germany! I thank my lucky stars for getting the exchange programme, considering that my grades aren't the most fantastic. I just wanted to go as far as I could, take on the challenge of being independent, completely unfamiliar and far far away from where I call home. I count my blessings for my love to be so supportive and encouraging of the trip, and I just love the way things fall into place for me. I am damn excite. I love german sausages and beer. :)

2009-02-08T14:33:00.001+08:00

This is seemingly possible it feels too surreal to be true.

2009-02-03T02:48:00.002+08:00

A new year, a new blogshop, a new beginning!

Check out http://allthingslovely.livejournal.com RIGHT NOW!

2009-01-28T12:44:00.005+08:00

happy oxpiscious niu year

2009-01-28T02:59:00.002+08:00

i've come to realise that there is a certain part of me that has grown enormously cynical and pessimistic through the years of growing up. i love to assume, jump to conclusions, win any argument and refuse to apologise when i'm in the wrong. i'm often the paranoid android and i'm always eager to accuse. to top that all up, i'm an escapist.

damn that makes me quite a mean bitch huh.

2009-01-27T05:41:00.002+08:00

mahjong and blackjack's totally not my cup of tea this cny, hoping that my gambling luck takes a turn and oxpiscious 2009 will be more than just good!

and its the second year running that we've encountered crazy schisse as a couple, flustering, feeling stupid, lost and overwhelmed by the sudden turn of events.

last year was a random breakdown on the expressway - we thought we pumped petrol into the diesel tank but that wasn't the case. we had an hour of panic + fear on the road, crawled to a nearby kiosk and sought help and we thought that was pretty traumatizing already.

this year, a trip to sindee's landed us at the woodlands checkpoint (haha!) due to my bad sense of direction - missed an exit and headed right towards the checkpoint. they needed our identification to get us through the u-turn, and the smartest person in ntu (coughs) did not have his ic nor license on him, while he was happily driving around.

landed our asses on the seats of the ica office and thinking how fucking suay we can get every year and got let off with a warning, led out of the office and finally made the u-turn of the year.

basket.

2009-01-26T05:49:00.003+08:00

then it was so uncertain, we lost our footing like a loose rung on a ladder

now, the ground is firm - i cannot ask for more

2009-01-25T03:26:00.004+08:00

Jet's Little Corner of Fame

My boyfriend is quite an asshole. Apart from sleeping the most of his day away, in his kickass aircon room, he is usually away in the gym, rowing his ass off at Bedok Reservoir, or just being plain annoying. Note: He doesn't need to study cos his GPA is alr fucking high. Like waaaaaaay higher than mine 'cos he's damn smart!

Our days usually begin with him waking up later than me. I crawl out of bed with his stinky breath by my face, get dressed and ready for school, kiss him goodbye and off I go to class. Due to Jet's goldfish memory, he often forgets that I've already gone to class and ends up looking for me when he awakens. Blur cock. Explains his bo-xim nature and that the earlier goodmorning+goodbye kisses were useless and done out of pretense.

Some mornings, I will reject all hand-holding/morning kiss requests due to late-night irritance from the man himself. Basket, he loves to do the whole nose clearing thingamajig which will last for 30 seconds, of non-stop, blasting action right beside my ear. And I will promptly smack him sober for waking me up in the midst of my beauty sleep. But sometimes after looking at his sillyboy face, I will offer him a tissue or a drink of water. I'm damn nice can.

We share a really tiny bed. I have this nagging suspicion that it's smaller than a single bed itself. Like seriously, Jet is so fat that when he walked past my room, I didn't have sunlight for 3 days. I often suffer from an acute sleep deprivation and I swear that his selfish nature of occupying more than half the bed which causes my daily tiredness. However, Jet has this amazing ability to dispel all of Hanniwongs' morning grumpiness with the signature bodoh babi smile, of which no known person has yet to display. That smile, I tell you, is not just an instant perk but also his life-saver when he offends the morningslut in me. You lucky bastard.

(Actually while typing this I have this sudden urge to be in bed with him cuddling and demanding like 50 sayangs in a row but his residency in Seng-fucking-Kang does not allow that because of its royal ulu-ness. )

......

To be continued

I apologise for a saccharinely sweet overdoses of lovenotes, but that's what gets me by daily.

2009-01-19T01:57:00.004+08:00

you're more than amazing.

2009-01-17T15:32:00.000+08:00

Winners never quit.

I still heart my smokes.

2009-01-08T23:28:00.001+08:00

Apparently I'm finding my long lost sister, Fault Wong.

2009-01-04T04:19:00.003+08:00

there must be something about you so alluring

that i cant put my finger on

its so easy when i cry, to just slip into your arms and fade the night away

to begin a whole new journey with you all over again

where i dissipate the moment of folly

when i know its where i truly long to be.

alap.

2009-01-04T03:54:00.003+08:00

Can't help but lament about last year; God, how i've grown, learnt and matured.

Am heading to the Land of a thousand smiles again in a week! Zx and I are more than excited for the weekend getaway - hoping for more great buys for the upcoming CNY, provided that nothing political erupts yet again.

School beckons; my month-long stint has once again ended. Will be needing some adjustment and mental preparation that my love + friends are into their dreaded graduating semester.

Change is inevitable, I'm gonna have to muster a lot more courage than I already have to step into our next phases in life. Undeniably there's that tinge of fear in me when I do the whole hypotheses + speculation regarding what the future brings. I will not, however, allow the evil self fulfilling prophecy to engulf me like it usually does.

Change will be conquered. :)

2009-01-02T04:26:00.003+08:00

It took me less than a fleeting moment to conclude that 2008 was more than just bittersweet. It was a concoction of intense love, betrayal, friendships and a more than messed up life - not the best brew i would say.

It was a constant struggle, definitely not a walk in the park, but there were brief moments when i knew everything was worthwhile. I did lose a few friends, or so I think, but gained many more in the process. Maybe karma really hit me right in the ass, but there were constantly hovering angels who alleviated the pain and struck a balance.

I've seen better days, really. 2009 sounds promising, or at least it doesn't seem like it would ever surmount my bleakest moments.

So 2009 brings lesser vulgarities, a skinnier me, and definitely a more clairvoyant, punctual, independent and patient woman. Sad but true, like what Zx said, doesn't this year's resolution sound like the last?

2009-01-02T00:47:00.003+08:00

2009 brings new hopes and less vulgarities.

2008-12-20T01:34:00.003+08:00

10 days in the awesome Philippines has resulted in the excessive missinggggg of my love.

Be back soon!

2008-12-14T22:55:00.002+08:00

Back from lovely Boracay, Philippines, wishing that you were right there as well.

Flying back tomorrow, hoping that I won't have to leave without you again.

Missing you much, love.

Better days!

2008-12-08T02:43:00.002+08:00

You're getting so fatherly its creeeeepy.

Heading to Boracay, Philippines for a work trip tomorrow! Gonna miss my lovely ones esp. my dearest favouriterestest person alive who tolerates my daily rubbish unconditionally.

Have a good week y'al!

2008-12-03T00:22:00.003+08:00

So the birthweek came and went, photos up soon! For once, truly felt loved, appreciated and in the sickest way it felt like a wedding.

Must be the bloody cake.

2008-11-25T01:06:00.002+08:00

i miss you steffo..

today i heard various good news about random people being parents, including jo!

feeding sheylene her bottle already causes severe boredom - gosh i can't imagine having a little one in my arms, as much as I anticipate for the arrival.

this month seems fantastic and i can't wait for the trips and the parties to start rolling!

2008-11-20T01:09:00.003+08:00

taking a breather for sanity's sake. asian art history is not exactly the best way to end a hectic semester.

now now ktv sounds the the proverbial 'end with a bang'!

2008-11-11T05:18:00.002+08:00

The past nights has seen me camping at ADM and here I am again at 5am, rushing the fucking journals, high on caffeine, holding my pee and wishing that I was snuggling up with you in bed.

2008-11-08T16:19:00.003+08:00

Seems like a another crazy month to come with exams on the 18-20th November, work beginning from the 24th, 21st birthday on the 26th, work trip to Phil in early December, Christmas, another holiday to wherever! Can't wait!

2008-11-01T17:26:00.002+08:00

Halloween in the day!

This year with Pam, Joan and like 9 others all over town for the SMRT Escape with Egypt launch. Great fun on a random day. And then it was Art Friend + Spotlight + Daiso for my art material spree with Cas Ho! Bad move. Bitch made me spend more money. But I love her anyhows.. Finally Yao's birthday dinner which I spoilt. Sorry laaaa my fault. Everything also my fault.

Bon week-end. As Yin would say.

2008-10-29T22:51:00.002+08:00

School is getting crazy. And I'm going crazy with all the weight I'm putting on in the midst of the avalanche. Thanks to the weekly comfort food i.e cookies, chicken wings and bubble tea + the newly discovered Lamington burger, I'm nowhere near skinny, neither am I fitting into my old pair of jeans anytime soon. Definitely not before my 21st birthday!

Well, hopefully my 2nd MTV stint in December will allow the emergence of a lighter Hanniwongs come Christmas 08. But with the evil girls around... I doubt that's happening. Somehow with the fretting of my size I just sound so weight obsessed in this blog. My attempts to run around NTU ought to increase in frequency.

Till then, Asian Art History + Graphic Design History, here I come..

Double Fuck.

2008-10-18T23:22:00.002+08:00

I am not your personal Goddess of Mercy, neither am I compassionate or patient. Not anymore especially when it comes to you. I am not on a humanitarian mission. I do not particularly enjoy sharing per se. Anger shall not engulf me. Neither will disappointment. It is not a loss. Nor a gain. Finally, enlightenment has sought me, things can only get better. Hanni is fine, as always.

I'll write it off as another bad experience. Just my fucking luck.

2008-10-18T22:50:00.000+08:00

I will never fall again. Not ever.

2008-10-18T12:42:00.002+08:00

After quote unquote Dane Cook "being a mind terrorist" last night, he settled on bringing me out to cycle on an ass-hurting bicycle. Reached destination, sat down, smoked a cigarette, drank one can of green tea and headed home with a sore gluteus maximus. Nice.

Yet another semester has flown by. The fear for examinations always creep in upon sighting the hall function rooms being converted into study rooms. This semester I'll have three papers to take on three consecutive days. Well at least it ends before my 21st, so thank god for that.

Okay back to work.

2008-10-05T13:26:00.002+08:00

i keep thinking about how i lost you as a friend and i have no qualms about reiterating what you said to me. does our friendship hold that little water? here's when the phrase "never trust men" comes into handy.

2008-10-04T02:56:00.002+08:00

I'm just far too sentimental sometimes. I cling on to too much hope, and too many memories. I salvage too many little fragments and I cry too much.

2008-10-04T02:03:00.003+08:00

Note to self*:

It's about time I get something properly done, it's been far too long since I've felt that spark ignite again, and I really should get back on track. I should stop scraping through life and having fluke shots instead of truly being good in what I do. I should stop relying on chance and relations to get somewhere, or get something done, but to be consistent and be that little bit more independent. No more moping about and getting nothing done, no more complications galore - clearly this has got to stop somewhere. No more harping, no more intentional harsh words, less angst, more love. Stop being indecisive, be less critical, be more forgiving. Be gracious. In the right ways. Make a decision and stick to it. Read more, share more, cuss less, smoke less. Lose some weight, have better time management. STOP BEING RELIANT.

Drink more milo, eat more chicken wings. I'm quite simple, really. No need for branded bags. jewellery, wallets. Just pretty clothes and a good hair day will suffice. Sleep deprivation drives me nuts. Appreciate more, whine less.

Consfirms.

2008-10-01T14:02:00.001+08:00

We are all damsels in distress at some point in time. It's just who you are after you get out of it.

2008-09-30T02:40:00.001+08:00

Working through the night is a big no-no because I just wolfed down half a mooncake in the midst of completing my Zeitgeist brief. So much for being on a diet.

2008-09-29T14:32:00.001+08:00

WARAKUUUUUUUUUUUU...!

2008-09-28T03:31:00.001+08:00

3.30am after a great conversation and a clear mind;

don't stop inspiring me.

2008-09-25T02:23:00.003+08:00

Four months into the fiasco and i finally feel like we're back. It's pretty astonishing how patient we both are with each other despite the various hoo-haas and crazy episodes for four full months. I don't know where did I manage to find so much faith to put into this relationship but I guess it's all worthwhile now. It was a uphill task considering your waves of idiocy and my moments of uncertainty. It's not what people say behind our backs anymore, it all boils down to what we believe in and what we share.

This is not the beginning of the end.

But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning.

2008-09-21T03:43:00.001+08:00

Great company, great food, great family.

Great weekend, nuff' said.

2008-09-19T17:53:00.003+08:00

All is fine and dandy.. Hanni is back!!

2008-09-08T23:23:00.003+08:00

Niece 1: Sheyenne

Niece 2: Sheylene

I love my family and my two little lovelies. I look forward to every single weekend where I can bask in the love of my siblings and parents and be spoilt with treats throughout!

Not to mention spending incredible time with my tandoori-loving friend, satisfying our various cravings that we rant about just before we fall asleep every Friday night after our not-so-long runs.